{"id":825147,"date":"2025-02-07T10:13:47","date_gmt":"2025-02-07T16:13:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/2025\/02\/07\/how-do-aromantic-nigerians-feel-about-the-season-of-love\/"},"modified":"2025-02-07T10:13:47","modified_gmt":"2025-02-07T16:13:47","slug":"how-do-aromantic-nigerians-feel-about-the-season-of-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/2025\/02\/07\/how-do-aromantic-nigerians-feel-about-the-season-of-love\/","title":{"rendered":"How do Aromantic Nigerians Feel About The Season of Love?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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With Valentine\u2019s Day<\/a> just around the corner, the season of love is about to be in full swing with flowers, pink hearts, and wrapped gifts filling every timeline and store promotion. But what does this time of year feel like for those who don\u2019t experience romantic attraction?<\/p>\n

Curious, Zikoko spoke to five young aromantic Nigerians to explore their thoughts on Valentine\u2019s Day. Aromanticism<\/a> is a romantic orientation that refers to having little to no romantic feelings toward others and experiencing minimal or no romantic desire or attraction. Like all expressions of identity, aromanticism exists on a spectrum \u2014 some aromantic people date occasionally, while others choose not to date at all.<\/p>\n

Navigating a World Built on Romance<\/h3>\n

Romantic love is deeply embedded in the fabric of society, shaping everything from media to traditions like Valentine\u2019s Day. For aromantic people, this can be both isolating and liberating. As we learned, while some aromantic individuals embrace aspects of the season, others find it commercialised, exhausting, or simply irrelevant.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s what five aromantic young Nigerians shared about their experiences with Valentine\u2019s Day.<\/p>\n

\u201cI Love My Friends Deeply, Just Not Romantically\u201d \u2014 Kosi (25, M).<\/h3>\n

I don\u2019t hate the Valentine\u2019s period at all. I\u2019m actually quite happy for people who are in love or have found love. I just don\u2019t relate to love in that way, personally. This is not to say I have no love in my life. I deeply love my friends and express that love as much as possible. I just don\u2019t experience romantic love \u2014 at least not in a way that is distinct from the love I have for my friends. I\u2019m still trying to find where I fit in in the expression of romantic love. I\u2019ve dated aromantic and asexual people in the past, and it was pretty okay. I\u2019ve spent two Valentine\u2019s in a relationship in the past, and I think I sent a gift each time. I\u2019m pretty sure I haven\u2019t ever gotten a Valentine\u2019s gift before, but I don\u2019t think I\u2019m missing out.<\/p>\n

My issues with Valentine\u2019s Day stem more from how it has been commercialised to such a point that it seems to celebrate consumerism and materialism more than the love itself. The branding of Valentine\u2019s Day focuses on the gifts, the cards, and the \u201cinstagrammability\u201d of all of that, and it rubs me the wrong way.\u00a0<\/p>\n

But aside from that, I think it\u2019s cute that even though we love all year round, we have a dedicated period where we celebrate it. I just wish it was less gimmicky.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve Never Celebrated Valentine\u2019s Even Platonically.\u201d \u2014 Beyy* (23, F).<\/h3>\n

I don\u2019t know if I\u2019m aroace, honestly. I\u2019ve never dated before, and I\u2019m not really looking to do it in the near future either. I\u2019m still figuring it out.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I have mixed feelings about Valentine\u2019s Day. I like that when done right, it\u2019s a very exciting time for women, especially because God knows we need more of those. At the same time, it really is just another time for me as I\u2019ve never engaged in it. I don\u2019t particularly care for it, but I think it\u2019s a cute time. Like I said, I don\u2019t date.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve never celebrated Valentine\u2019s even platonically, but I might give it a try this year. Unfortunately, the only thing I can remember about past Valentine\u2019s Days is experiencing other people\u2019s joy over it. I stayed in the hostel for the first three years of secondary school, and the anticipation the girls had for gifts sent to the hostel was one of the most exciting things about the day. They would make it a whole event, leaning outside the windows, waiting for someone to come, teasing the recipients of the gifts and just having fun with it. It made the day nice. Female joy is always lovely to see.<\/p>\n

\u201cI Don\u2019t Mind Valentine\u2019s Season Particularly, But I Find All The Marketing Exhausting\u201d\u2014 Dele* (26, M).<\/h3>\n

I\u2019m aromantic so it\u2019s difficult for me to connect with people romantically. I still try but it never lasts very long. I don\u2019t mind the Valentine\u2019s season though, I think couples in love are cute even if I don\u2019t really relate to their experience.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t mind Valentine\u2019s season particularly, but I find all the marketing exhausting. I think we need a time to celebrate love the way we celebrate Christmas or any other holiday, but we need to make it less of a money grab. The women in my life \u2014 my friends and sisters \u2014 absolutely love the pink hearts, chocolates and all that serenren, so I celebrate by getting them small gifts for Valentine\u2019s.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u201cI Usually Like To Spend Valentine\u2019s Day By Myself\u201d\u2014Toni* (24, F).<\/h3>\n

I usually like to spend Valentine\u2019s Day by myself. I think there are a lot of spoken and unspoken expectations around the season, even from people who claim to understand why I\u2019m not very interested in romantic love and its bells and whistles.\u00a0<\/p>\n

My friends have persuaded me to attend a Galentine event. It will be all girls, low pressure, and good vibes, and I\u2019m actually looking forward to it. It would be great to find a way that I can celebrate the season without feeling like I\u2019m not being genuine.<\/p>\n

\u201cI Don\u2019t Usually Think About The Events Of The Day Because I\u2019m Busy Thinking About How To Celebrate My Birthday\u201d \u2014 Rotimi* (22, M).<\/h3>\n

I don\u2019t really mind Valentine\u2019s season. My birthday is three days after Valentine\u2019s Day, so I\u2019m grateful that I don\u2019t usually think about the events of the day because I\u2019m busy thinking about how to celebrate my birthday. I focus on celebrating the love I have with my friends when they come to celebrate with me, and I prefer it this way.<\/p>\n

A Valentine\u2019s Beyond Romance<\/h3>\n

As these stories show, Valentine\u2019s Day often sparks different emotions and perspectives for aromantic people. While some view it as a celebration of consumerism, others use the season to focus on platonic love and appreciation for their loved ones.\u00a0<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re looking to celebrate loved ones in a non-romantic way this Valentine\u2019s Day, here are some thoughtful gift ideas to consider<\/a>. It\u2019s a great way to honor the bonds that matter most \u2014 romantic or not.<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n

Betty Godson
Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

With Valentine\u2019s Day just around the corner, the season of love is about to be in full swing with flowers, pink hearts, and wrapped gifts filling every timeline and store promotion. But what does this time of year feel like for those who don\u2019t experience romantic attraction? Curious, Zikoko spoke to five young aromantic Nigerians<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":825148,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[84709,39961],"tags":[141503,89657],"class_list":{"0":"post-825147","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-aromantic","8":"category-nigerians","9":"tag-aromantic","10":"tag-nigerians"},"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/825147","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=825147"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/825147\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/825148"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=825147"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=825147"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsycanuse.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=825147"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}