Tom Stewart played in a grand final. Then a private health battle began

Ten years ago, Tom Stewart could have been described simply as “a chippy” who had played in a couple of flags with South Barwon.

He was typically Geelong, an ex-St Joseph’s lad with a girlfriend, Emma, from Sacred Heart College, a bunch of close mates, a carpentry apprenticeship and a side hustle on the weekends with the Cats’ VFL team.

The sort of bloke that might stumble into a local hotel any weekend this winter.

Stewart knew he could play, but he had ended his teenage years after playing for Geelong Falcons with enough going on in his life to distract him from making football his profession.

He seemed content winning premierships with South Barwon, playing representative football and being a classic full-back, a 100-kilogram defender who picked up the best opposition forward.

Then, at 22, as he began training with Geelong under Shane O’Bree in the VFL, his latent ambition stirred.

“I just thought I’d be doing myself, and those people at South [Barwon] who believed in me a disservice if I didn’t give it my absolute all,” Stewart said.

In the pre-season he lived on kangaroo meat and rice, wore a tool belt by day and footy boots by night. He had reduced his weight to 94 kilograms when the season started. The No.67 Geelong jumper he wore was almost hanging off his 92-kilogram frame when it finished.

After making it clear to every AFL club interested in drafting him that his preference was to remain in Geelong, his name was still on the board when Stephen Wells plucked him at pick 40, the Cats’ second pick after they chose Brandan Parfitt at 26.

Stewart was 24 years and 11 days old when he made his debut in round one, 2017.

Early in his first match, Stewart nudged the Dockers’ Nat Fyfe under the ball to take the first of his now trademark intercept marks.

“It was almost like an epiphany, like holy shit. This is actually happening,” he said.

On Saturday night, as verified by stats guru @sirswampthing, Stewart will become just the fifth player to reach 200 matches having turned 24 before making their debut.

Len Hughes (Collingwood), Barry Rowlings (Hawthorn/Richmond), Darren Jarman (Hawthorn/Adelaide) and Andrew Thompson (St Kilda) are the other four. He is the first of the 2016 draft class to reach 200 matches.

He became a star playing in the style of his coach and urger at South Barwon, Cats champion Matthew Scarlett, who had spruiked him to the Cats, positioning his slightly undersized body to take intercept marks and using his speed to rebound. That he did so as well as his predecessor in the No.44 jumper Corey Enright was galling to opposition fans.

“I’ve always been fast,” Stewart said. “My biggest strength was my closing speed. I always had speed and power.”

He could mark, too, with those strong carpenter’s hands regularly putting the ball in a vice.

At training, he made sure he picked up Tom Hawkins or Patrick Dangerfield if they went forward to compete with them in the air. He gained confidence in his aerial ability and developed his craft and positioning. Soon enough in games he was backing himself to leave his man and intercept the ball in the air and on the ground.

He learnt from teammates such as then-skipper Joel Selwood that winning the ball often wasn’t about technique or confidence, it was will. “Pure desire” are the words Stewart uses.

But it was not all as easy as it might have seemed. That pure desire sometimes overwhelmed Stewart, as it had since his junior days.

“I used to get myself so worked up before a game. I would make myself sick. I just put such a high premium on football. That it was used to my detriment because I’d get to the game and I’d be exhausted,” Stewart said.

In his first year especially he’d become more mentally than physically drained in the build-up as he stressed about what lay ahead. He battled with the expectations he put on himself and his desperation not to let anyone, including himself, down.

Then COVID hit. That girlfriend from Sacred Heart, Emma, was now Stewart’s wife, pregnant with their first child.

“I almost think of my career as pre- and post-COVID. Pre-COVID everything was footy, every decision, every waking moment was dedicated towards how I can succeed on the field?” Stewart said.

He built lifelong bonds with the Cats’ families in the Southport hub where Geelong lived on their way to the grand final before his world was flipped on its head when their first son, Arthur, was born in Queensland days after the season finished.

“You spend the first month of your parental journey in and out of the children’s [hospital] in Queensland and in the NICU ward with the young fella with a heart condition (supraventricular tachycardia ) and everything just gets put into perspective,” Stewart said.

Stewart’s priorities shifted, yet he felt his football improved. All the same attributes and worries and wins and losses remained, but his ability to deal with them improved. As did, thankfully, Arthur’s health. With medical help for which Stewart will always be grateful, he grew into a healthy, bright boy.

Stewart won two best-and-fairest awards and a flag in the following three seasons, bringing his tally of All-Australians to five with selection in 2021, 2022 and 2023.

“To win the premiership was like no other feeling I have ever had … what made it so sweet in ’22 was that group had been through a lot together,” he said.

In defence Stewart was as tough as a spotted gum or as cool as a fern-filled forest, depending on what the situation demanded.

He overcame footy setbacks. A Lisfranc injury sidelined him for the 2021 finals series as the Cats were thumped in a preliminary final. In 2022, he was suspended for four matches for a poor bump on Richmond’s Dion Prestia, which he didn’t even try to defend at the tribunal. And then the Cats missed finals for the first time in his career in 2023.

But he had a premiership to show for it, his son was up and about, and another child, daughter Charlie, was born. Life was good.

But nothing on the journey had prepared him for the devastation he felt when he was concussed in the preliminary final when tackled by the Hawks’ Mabior Chol and forced to sit out last year’s grand final.

“I was pissed off with the world. It was hard, even as a mature man … I was f—ing flat. I couldn’t sleep. I didn’t want to talk to anyone,” Stewart said.

He had no issue with the protocols or the lack of a bye heading into the grand final which may, or may not, have enabled him to play. Nor did he have a problem with the diagnosis. He was just battling to deal with the emotional fallout.

Stewart could not think of anything worse than to show his face in public.

“I just felt, I don’t know. I was just so sad. And the outpouring of support and all the kind words and the love that I felt didn’t soften the blow at all,” he said.

“That was all stuff that I was feeling, but my initial response, was how can I help?”

The club told Stewart to do whatever he wanted, but he knew he had to front up to training and prove to himself, if nothing else, that he actually possessed the character to act well in the situation.

“I was just trying to be the man that I thought I was, and that I’d earned the respect [for] over that 10-year period. It didn’t mean it was easy. It didn’t mean I got it right,” Stewart said.

“But that was where I kept coming back to. It was, ‘righto, this is an opportunity to prove that in some pretty shit circumstances, I can still care, still support, still be honest, still have humility, still handle the situation with grace’. It still feels like a blur.”

That response, combined with his sensible post-match remarks about the importance of protecting players who are concussed, reflected Stewart’s personality. He is thoughtful, sometimes emotional, but always focused on trying to do the right thing by those around him.

Playing for Victoria in February’s State of Origin match against Western Australia helped him bounce back and attack the season with renewed vigour. Arthur finally realised his dad “had a pretty cool job” when the families joined players for a photo after the siren.

Arthur stood with his dad next to Nick Daicos and Marcus Bontempelli. He now thinks the Bulldogs champion named his business “Arthur’s Milkbar” after him.

“He keeps saying ‘Bont’ named his cafe after me because we’re friends,” Stewart said.

That chippy from South Barwon from a decade ago will enjoy the milestone with family and lifelong friends.

“I’ve had the same group of mates since I was 15. I’ve got a group of 11 mates who, outside my genuine blood relatives, are my family,” Stewart said.

“I think I’ll be emotional on Saturday night because I’ll look up in the stands and I’ll see the same blokes I was playing under 14s with at South.

“People think I’m taking the piss when I say that my career is like being in a dream. There are still some days when I walk in, and I’m like, f—, I’m such a lucky bloke.”

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